I'm not a big awards show watcher - except the Grammy's. Those are in a league of their own. I'd rather be watching Sunday Night Football, but I recognize football's over so I should learn to be more flexible.
Tonight, I made it roughly 48 minutes in the award show before I had to change the channel. Step Brothers is on FX. Enough said.
- "Why are you sweating?"
- "I was watching 'Cops.'"
A few thoughts on tonight's Oscars Red Carpet and first 48 minutes of the actual show:
• Why do stars opt for a dress-shoe combo in which they can't walk? Exhibit Scarlett Johansson. Although I guess I'd be unsteady too...without Ryan Reynolds at my side.
• Natalie Portman's purple was rocking
• I would like Morgan Freeman to narrate my dreams...and well, just my life in general...also.
• Why isn't Charlie Sheen hosting? James Franco and Anne Hathway's chemistry is non-existent and awkward for us all.
• I had time to paint my toenails a bright pink and change the sheets on my bed.
• Sing more songs. Where's Eminem?
• Anne Hathaway has some pipes as well as some awesome glitterific shoes, but again, she can't walk in them.
Okay...and now back to Step Brothers.